Welcome to Learn Share Grow with Hayden Wilson. Today we are talking all about self worth and how you can improve your value in the market place, develop your self confidence and consequently, your self worth. I struggled with my own self worth for a long time (and still do from time to time). Which is how I developed these strategies.
Today we go over 4 of these tried and tested strategies to help you with it, and also help you understand where your skill set lies.
We also cover the difference between traits and skills, followed by some exercises you can try to get your self worth up.
Listen on the Podcast
Full Transcription Below
Hey guys, Hayden Wilson here and welcome to Learn Share Grow live, Episode 14. Today we are talking all about self development in you and self worth.
So I want to speak to you about how you can develop your self worth and I’ve got four strategies to share with you today around this topic and they are very actionable so you can learn them quite quickly and can implement them straight away. The first thing that I want to talk about here is to make a skills list.
When you are creating your skills list you need to be aware that there are two different things here. By looking to increase your self worth you need to be aware of what you’re actually good at, where your skills lie.
The fallacy that most people fall into is, not knowing the difference between skills and traits. So, we’ve got traits, such as, you might be friendly, you might be an honest person, you might be approachable – these are all great traits to have, they’re usually inherent in your personality, you’ve grown up with them and you’ve developed them that way but then you’ve got skills – you’ve actively developed those skills such as communication skills, analytical skills, or coaching - you might be a good coach, or a PT for example – you’ve developed these skills that aren’t inherently given to you when you were younger.
So what I want you to do, to increase your self worth and self awareness on what you are actually good at and when you can provide value into the world, is just sit down with a pen and paper and for half an hour – have a coffee with you – and sit down and detail, write down the numbers 1 – 20 and you can decide where you are providing value into the world and what is different about you.
Why are you different because everyone’s got something different about them. I might be good in a certain area and I might come up confident in front of the camera because I’ve developed that skill and now that is valuable to the market place. You might be much better at something than me.
For example, you might know how to get someone super duper lean. These are the skills and that means your self worth for that particular area should be a lot higher because you have those skills, you’ve developed those skills. So once you start to realise why you’re better in specific areas than other people – and it’s not better in an arrogant way, it’s knowing your skills set and knowing the value that you can provide into the world. The second thing that I want you to do is to carry yourself with success. So when you look good, you feel good.
When you feel good, you give good. When you give good, you receive good. I heard this from my good friend Liz who I’ve written a couple of blogs about and she’s a phenomenal person, and she started taking notice of how I was carrying myself around situations when I was with her.
I started dressing nicer, I started speaking nicer. I would lift my chest up and walk with purpose. I want you to start walking faster – I know it sounds strange, but when you start walking faster people start thinking, hmm he has something on his mind and inherently, pretty much by tricking yourself, you have somewhere important to be. So get moving, move 20% quicker than other people, run up the stairs. All these little things can start to separate yourself and elevate your own self worth.
You can start thinking that you’re higher – and again, not in an arrogant way, it’s knowing your value in the world.
The next thing that I want you to do is inform the PPO policy which is Positive People Only. So I want you to look at who you hang around – the cliché is that you are the sum of the five people that you spend the most time with. So I really want you to look at the five people you spend the most time with and ask yourself are these people helping me to reach my goals, or are they cancer and do I need to cut them off.
Unfortunately, there have been people in my life and I’m sure there will be some in yours, there have been people who aren’t positive for what you need and what area or stage you’re at in your life – sometimes we realise early on that these people aren’t healthy for us, sometimes it can take a couple of years, but if you haven’t got into that mindset of positive people only, then you need to get there because once you start surrounding yourself with positive people everything else starts to fall in place and these people want to help you reach your goals and they will start to see your passion for specific areas. Once you can drive that passion then you can start seeing your value and of course, your worth then your confidence goes up.
Everything is attributing to you providing more value into the world and you’ll start to see yourself in a more positive light. So surround yourself with the best possible people. The fourth thing I want you to do is make a proud list. I’ve been doing this at night time.
Usually I journal in the morning but sometimes at night time I will write a journal which is what I’m proud of and it starts to build awareness – even small things that I’ve done, maybe someone has dropped $5 for example, and you hand it back to them.
Or maybe someone doesn’t check up on something and rather than letting it go, you start to fill in, you’ve done the right thing, you’re proud of yourself for stepping up and doing what normal people, what you might not normally do. But now, you’re acting in that way, being a leader, showing people, leading by example, that these are the little things that you can do and just start detailing them.
What this is going to do is help you build an awareness over the small things that do make a difference and do build up your self worth. You need to create these habits and the more you do it, the more you’re going to see these routines, then you can just replicate it and start repeating what is it about you that is giving you that sense of self worth and how can we do more of it.
So the four things I want to go over are make your skills list; to carry yourself with success – remember chest up, walk faster, you’ve got somewhere to be, you’re important; positive people only, surround yourself with the best possible people, the five people that you are around who you are going to model yourself on, find mentors, find people who have achieved greater success than you and start asking questions and follow up on their advice; and the fourth thing was to make a proud list – at night time just detail 2 - 3 things that have made you proud, that you have done yourself, that you know are the right thing to do, and by this we are going to see the patterns.
Thanks for watching. If you have any questions just chuck them in the comments box on the side.
Today we’re also doing because I had a give-away last week for a phenomenal book, Kelly McGonigal’s ‘The Will Power Instinct’ and I have three copies to give away.
The winners for those simply had to share a video posted previously on my fan page, and that’s a whole different kettle of fish, the three winners are: Alex – congratulations, Jen and Kristy. Guys I will be messaging you and getting your addresses so I can shoot out this phenomenal book.
For anyone watching who is interested in more competitions, there are definitely some more coming up, you just have to tune in and share the word because I love spreading the message of learning and sharing and growing and I need your help also.
Sally has just said thanks Hayden, some really good points, will definitely try these. Awesome Sally, you’re going to benefit a lot from these, I know that because you’re quite a positive person, I see what you put up, and you’ve doing really well so good luck.
If you have any questions or if anyone else has any questions, feel free to ask me, I’m more than happy to help out
So, that is how we develop our self worth.
If you have any questions let me know.